National Pothole Competition: The 10 best holes in Sofia

Written by on March 25, 2017 in Leisure - Comments Off on National Pothole Competition: The 10 best holes in Sofia

 

The list of winners and losers:

10th place: “The Smoothie”

This grade D pothole gave most jury members a good “feel”, but it did not show any destruction force at all.

“The Smoothie” became the loser in the competition. What a disappointment.

9th place: “The Shaker”

These corrugations, at the intersection of Boulevards Pencho Slavejkov and Praga, which have annoyed and shaken 478.4 million drivers and passengers in 239.7 million cars and buses since 1972, were disqualified after the results came in. They did not qualify as potholes.

“The Wave” was disqualified, since it is not a pothole.

8th place: “The Vibrator”

More corrugations, located at Orlov Most, were disqualified from the National Pothole Competition too, even though they damage vehicles coming from Boulevard Evlogi i Hristo Georgiev. The other day, a bus driver had to pick up the 32,000 parts of his Chinese-made bus (line 72), after the vehicle fell apart as a result of crossing “The Vibrator”.

“The Vibrator” at Orlov Most was disqualified as well.

7th place: “The Ripper”

“The Ripper” may have won the 7th prize only, but it was rated a grade B multi-purpose pothole. It does a lot of damage, especially at 100 km/h. And it does slit tyres. The jury awarded the special “Pirelli Killer” prize to “The Ripper”.

“The Ripper” got a special prize from the jury.

6th place: “The Snake Trap”

It looks like that snake hole Indiana Jones needed to climb into, in “Raiders of the Lost Ark”. While stepping into the trap in the dark, four jury members sprained their feet. Two jurors had to be taken to Pirogov Hospital on stretchers. An excellent hole.

“The Snake Trap” is an excellent shoe killer.

5th place: “The Widowmaker”

One jury member crashed his BMW 760Li into a parked car in front of “Lilly” after taking “The Widowmaker” at 110 km/h. The invoice he got from the BMW Service Center was 28,544 Leva. An excellent grade A pothole.

“The Widowmaker” got impressive grades.

4th place: “The China Syndrome”

This one is too good to believe. One jury member climbed into “The China Syndrome”, in order to inspect it. The next day he called from Shanghai.

The jury at the competition was impressed by “The China Syndrome”.

3rd place: “The Manhole Pothole”

This multi-hole is a huge pothole, a manhole and a tyre killer in one. A hole in the hole. The jury was also impressed by its cleanliness. Absolutely no dust, no stones or waste were found here.

“The Manhole Pothole” could not have done better.

2nd place: “The Endless Furrow”

This long pothole was one of the nicest ones the jury found. It has the length of a winner, the right looks and a good feel. Six tyres were slashed. It hardly gets any better than this.

“The Endless Furrow” is long and elegant.

1st place: “The Soup”

“The Soup” got the 2017 “Pothole of the Year” award due to its exposure. Located in the very center of the city, it is being admired by tourists and inhabitants alike.

“The soup” hit the big one. (Photo by Spasi Sofia).

There was going to be a Global Pothole Competition as well. But when the other countries saw pictures of Bulgarian potholes, they retracted their applications. “How in the hell are we supposed to beat that ****?”, asked the American applicant.

Related article: “The 10 least sexy cars on Sofia’s Dondukov Boulevard”

 

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About the Author

Imanuel Marcus, the founder of foreignersandfriends.com, is Associate Editor of The Sofia Globe.